Mistress of the Moon- Sapphira Raine- Hart

My name is Sapphira. Saph to those who know me well, though there were a few times I was called Sapphire... *shrugs* Just a mishap of the name I guess. I am writing to share my story... It isn't exactly an easy one, but it's my story just the same... I am hoping in doing this I can figure out something... Solutions to things I have been facing.

First- Who am I? I am one of the few members of the Cerean Clan that still survived after the great battle of Eudora. I was one of the rare 6 chosen to wield a strong form of Power that many once thought only a legend.

I still have nightmares about the battle that took my parents from me. Our home exploded right in front of me. I had no means of being able to protect them. No way to save them... It was the day my life was taken from me.
But I also remember the man who gave my life back. The young Prince of King Sidel Hart. Adam.

Wild and carefree, I liked him almost instantly. He was like me in some ways, and yet there were ways in which we were different too. It was the perfect set up I guess you can say. He stood up to Dominik the first night we met to make sure that I was all right. I surprised him in many ways that night. Just as he surprised me. I remember wondering about the different feelings I felt when I was caught up in his arms. The things he made me feel... well... nothing short of amazing. AS I lay falling asleep in his arms, I knew I would be returning regardless of what Dominik's answer to the king was. Apparently Aurora had felt the same- for different reasons of course.

Trying to train Adam was interesting. I can't count how many times I hid my smile as I watched Adam use Silas as a target for some of his practices. And hand to hand combat? Well... Only works if that is actually what we are doing lol. I remember a few trips to the woods with the others in which... well... I'll say he was a "bad guy" who enjoyed being caught by the "good girl" lol. Yes... our training exercises usually ended up leading to more. It was us. Passionate was weak to discribe us.

We married the same time Aurora and Adair were married. The same day Adair was crowned King. I had not said anything, but I had been expecting our first child at that time. As far as anyone really thought- I gave birth prematurely. But our son was nothing short of beautiful; his father's hair and eyes that were very unique... Kind of a mix of crimson and violet. Being parents never slowed us down- though because of the war we were much more careful with him. As much as we wanted to take him out more often, we knew we could not.

The day I had to tell Adam to take our son and leave Eudora.... I never thought I could make it. I wanted to go with them. I didn't want to part with them. Adam and I knew I was the stronger one of us so I had to remain to fight. But we hated it. I don't think our last night could have been any better than it was... We clung to each other as if our lives depended on each other alone. There were times I felt without him I literally was dead... There are times I sometimes still feel that way. I never dreamed of my life without him.

That battle took a lot from everyone. I was so badly injured the Elders themselves had to heal me which took forever. As far as Aurora and Adair knew, I had been killed in battle. It was not true- but I had no means of telling them and the Elders had locked themselves away with me to continuously watch me, so they were unable to reach my friends as well.

For 300 years, I remained locked away, healing until I could move on my own once more. To this day, I thank Sol for being the primary reason as to why I am alive right now. He was there, feeding me his energy day in and day out. My wedding ring burned on my finger as a constant reminder of who I had to live for. I had no idea how much time had passed when I first stepped back into the daylight. When I had realized that 300 years had passed, i realized that so much time had gone by that even if they'd had hope for my life they had to have thought me for dead. But I still did what I could to try to locate them. I used my spells to get from place to place as I had no money of my own. Several people knew me then as the Moon Mistress as I would appear in moonlight, and with the right look, I could charm who was needed to get a roof over my head and a bite to eat. I never slept with anyone. I remained saved. The ring on my hand still reminded me of my family. I knew I had to find them again. I just hoped it wouldn't be too late.

One day I caught a break when I read about a popular dance club run by a man with the last name of Hart. It was to be closed that evening for a special event. As I checked farther, I saw what the event was. The owner's brother, Adam, was to be married. I stared in shock at the picture. I swear my heart froze. I knew it semed outrageous to think he would not take another in the time that had passed. To wait 300 years on a wife everyone thought was dead... I knew how ridiculous it sounded.

I kept my appearance a secret. I wish I hadn't now, but I did not want to ruin the new life he was creating. He looked so happy in that picture. Like he did when he and I were first seeing each other. No... I couldn't interfere.

He never knew it.... but I was there. I watched him as he spoke the same words he once spoke so tenderly to me... I watched him place a ring on her hand. Then I could not watch anymore. As silently as I entered, I left. I ran. I could not stay. I could not go to Adair and Aurora after that. I just couldn't. But fate is cruel sometimes...

I was out on my luck and Aurora tracked me down. She convinced me to come home with her. They had a spare room I could borrow. When I asked her about him, she told me he was on his honeymoon. I figured it would be okay for a little while. But he came home... He and his new wife... they came home. I fled my room and into the safety of a nearby forest. It is where I came into contact with a woman calling herself Rose. We fought. Once more I was badly injured. But when I heard Adam's voice... They took him... and not longer after they took me.

I woke to a throbbing pain in my head and excrutiating pain in my shoulder where it was disconnected. I had a cover over my face so I could not see where I was. But I sensed that I wasn't alone. The cover was lifted and I froze when I opened my eyes.

Adam...

My Adam... he was with me...

I don't know if I thought I was in a dream or what it was, but the longer we were together and alone in that cell, the more wrapped up in the past we became. We were lost in each other. I could feel him... he was with me, near me, within me again... It was only when we woke we remembered his wife... I felt his instant guilt.

I couldn't wait to get away...

I tried to okay. WE were helped out and made our way home. Adair found me and we had a long talk... Adam went... and confessed to his wife.

It was 2 months later I learned I was expecting... I was both happy and crushed at the same time. I did fine on my own. I kept it a secret from everyone. When I got to be about 7 months along, I began to show and I knew I couldn't remain in the house. I did not want Kaida to know. I did not want to come between his new marriage. So I left. Dorian checked in on me with no one knowing for a few weeks, and them .... Then Adam found out...

He was upset that I did not tell him. He wanted to be there for me. For our child... He understood my reasons... But it still hurt him.

Somehow I managed to give birth to a baby girl. I suffered greatly near the end of this pregnancy as I was under a constant psychic attack, and Adam was in constant fear for me and the baby. But we did all right...

I lived with Syeira outside the Hart home. We had a nice place and Adam was really supportive. He did everything he could for her.

Including bring her back to life... She and the family we lived with were killed by vampires. I was numb. I couldn't really think. He acted so quickly... But then I remembered another little girl who lived there. Her body was never found. He went back with the others to see if they could find her. Somehow she found me. And at the moment I was bringing her in and checking her for any wounds, Syeria was taken from our home... I.. I still have not seen her... I don't know if she is okay. I am extra careful with Riza. She is like my daughter now. She can't replace Syeira, but she needs me. Her mother... she was killed... her family.. literally pulled apart... Riza only has me now...

It... it is hard to see him and Kaida together. To know that I cannot be for him what she is now- it hurts more than anyone can ever imagine. The day I removed the ring from my left hand... I thought my life was gone... I felt so empty. So lost... the life he gave me... it was gone...

No one ever sees me cry... I hadn't cried since my parents were killed. I was Aurora's stone warrior. My emotions never showed. No one knew my weakness. No one could phase me. I went into battle fiercely and with everything I had. I showed no fear. It just wasn't me. But the night I removed that ring... I hid in my room that night... And for a week straight I did nothing but cry... I could not eat. I could not dream for I could not sleep. I felt like an empty shell. He sensed it. It hurt him to feel what I was feeling. But I couldn't help it no matter how hard I tried... I wanted him. I loved him. I wasn't ready to let go... I'm... I'm still not...

But I am doing better... I think...

My world was turned upside down again though about a week ago... The Hart home... I had just stepped outside with Riza; we were blown away from it when it exploded. Aurora, Natara, Bryant, Zahara, Dorian... Adam.... They were all still inside... I froze at first... It was like seeing my parents blow up in front of me all over again. Those I loved so dearly still trapped inside the smoldering chaos left behind in the aftermath. I knew where Adam had been. In the kitchen... I gave Riza to Adair and rushed passed Kaida to where the kitchen used to be. I dug and dug... My nails tore, the tips of my fingers burnt and bled as I dug deeper into the destruction.

I felt some relief when my fingertips brushed his hand. I gripped him tightly with one hand and hurried to dig closer to where I figured his face would be. I cried out his name when I finally got through, letting go of his hand, I cleared more and more away from him. I was almost afraid to touch his face. He was so pale... so very pale... He wouldn't open his eyes... I tried to call out to him, but my voice wouldn't work. My fear had frozen it... When he started to come around... His words did not make much sense to me... Then again I may not have heard him very clearly either... I wanted so desperately to just hold him... But as I removed more debris from him.... I physcially froze and went numb. He had been impaled by a piece of the frame work of the house, straight through the middle... a wound that would certainly have killed him... My world crashed around me. I freaked out. I lost control... I screamed for his brother to help... Adair got the wood out of his brother, but he wsa far from out of danger.

I watched him taken to the ambulance. I thought for sure it was the last time I would ever see him again... I clung to Riza and said my goodbyes... I wanted to be there... to hold his hand to tell him once more I loved him... But I knew it wasn't my place... So with all I could, I told Kaida to go... I told her I would take Soran and Kaira... that I would get us all a place to stay. That she needed to be with him... She started to tell me I should go and I stopped her. I am not his wife anymore... she is... He needs her... So I took the kids and left... nd when they were asleep.... I sat in the chair and watched them... wondering how Kida would explain to them their father would not be coming home... I cried myself to sleep....

My world.... was cold... and once again... I was alone... I was frightened... and I was alone.

I think I was dreaming... But I opened my eyes and stopped when I saw him... He had come for his children... He was alive... I couldn't scream because Riza was still alseep, but he was alive... I was too shocked to move... At first I took him for a ghost... I know that wound was a mortal one. I know he should have been killed...

Then I remembered... he couldn't stay... He returned to his room with his wife...

I was surprised when he came back a little while later... And for the first time... I let someone see me cry... I clung to him... And he just held me... Just like he used to. He held me until we fell asleep...

Ra... this is so hard... I watch him go back to her and wonder why he can't be with me... The Fates are cruel... no one should have to face this... this kind of pain... How... How can I just turn down the love I feel for him? How can I control it? How can I remain sane knowing that at night he curls up beside her while I sleep alone...

I feel the tears stinging again... I can't believe how selfish I sound... That isn't Sapphira Raine... that isn't who I am...

I fear that one day I will do something I will regret... that I would push Adam into something he doesn't want to be a part of... I'm afraid I will come between his marriage... his family... That fear keeps me away... Keeps me quiet when he is around. He doesn't understand the pain that goes through me at seeing them... Knowing that it should be me...

Knowing it could have been me...

Now here is where I post some corny tagline like "Never has there been such a tale of Woe- such as the one of Juliet and her Romeo...."

Unfortunately... I'm not in the mood to be corny...

This is my story thus far... I wonder what the fates have in store for me next...

Sapphira Raine-Hart

posted by Lady Aurora Phoenix @ 10:35 AM Comments: 0